is there another?

it's late

and i'm thinking again

usually not a good combination, but ah well, it's keeping me awake.

you know, one of those can't sleep until you can think something through nights. 

i've been wondering lately if there is another little to join our family. 

i wonder if they are out there yet, watching us, and just waiting for the right moment to come into our little family. 

is there another birthmother out there, that would see us fit to raise their precious child? 

we already know that we are going to have to fight to get everything turned in for another adoption.

we already know that

and we are working on it with everything that we have in us. 

but what if this is it? 

what if, there are just going to be the three of us?

i can't believe it. 

i KNOW there is another one out there. 

at least one. 

so, if i know that there is another one, why do i have these feelings of doubt? why do the little "this is it" things keep coming into my head? 

why is it so dang hard to get to that point that we can just push through?

i am trying to be patient. i really am.

but it's hard to be patient when everything depends on someone else.

hopefully things will work out quickly, so we can get started with it again. 

anywho...thanks for letting me voice my thoughts. 

let's hope i can go to bed now. 

if not, i will be sitting here, 

wishing, 

hoping, 

and praying 

that there is another one out there.